Thought Of The Day

May was showing itself with all the pride of summer ahead, a merciless display of the heat that was coming for the next few summer months. Mom and I strolled along the beach, forgetting work and studies, along a beach even with absent holidaymakers who only wanted the intensity of the sun, and I longed to bathe in the sea, because my feet in contact with the water told me that the temperature was just right. Mom told me to go home and put on my bikini, but my youthful energy and impetus could not wait, so I decided to take off my clothes and bathe in my panties and bra. At that moment I needed that contact with the sea. At a family meal mom told me the story and everyone said I was a crazy girl. My grandmother said that I was not a crazy girl, but just a young girl and we all laughed. Not because of my decision to bathe in my underwear, but because my grandmother, in the face of the subtlest, softest and simplest of attacks on me, always defends me.

Yes, I understand the problem of women who, by nature, have large breasts, but many photographs are not by nature, but by operation. Even in that case I understand it too, that they may need a smaller size because the one their body has developed is extremely small, but I do not understand the surgical operations of monstrous breasts nor the mental intention that a woman can have to take such a decision knowing the problems that for her back can suppose such an attitude. I once told Mom that when she was making me she didn't spend much time thinking about the size of my future boobs and Mom told me that she would rather have a big brain than big boobs. And we laughed.

 

Ahhh! To be young and carefree. It's a great story. I don't think you're crazy, well maybe a little bit, but who says that's a bad thing ? Honestly I would have done the same thing, although I would look pretty weird in panties and bra.

Your abuela seems like a delightful women. I think all grandma's are the same. My grandma would always scold mom for scolding me . Mom would say "You're spoiling him mom" and grandma would come back with "I can't do your job for you, it's your job to discipline him, and it's my job to spoil him" .

I don't really get it as well. I can understand women working in the porn industry might do it to reverse the effects of gravity after a certain age. It's their livelihood, so I can give them a pass. But other than that, I don't know why, these faje boobs, they look like this huge blobs of protrusion, not very pleasing to look at. It's a HUGE TURN OFF for me. I don't suppose they feel that good either. Yeah brain over boobs anyday. Brain over penis size anyday. Whatever little problem smallish boobs can create, can be solved with a smart brain but problem in brain department can't be solved with boobs no matter how big they are. If I were a woman I would want a medium size boobs I think, most women embrace motherhood and they get bigger anyways during pregnancy.

 

The same thing happens with my grandmother, mom always reproaches her for spoiling her grandchildren when she was always stricter with her and her siblings, but my grandmother always replies "you are my children, they are my grandchildren, it's not the same thing". When mom insists, my grandmother replies "I have had four sons and you have only one daughter, you have nothing to teach me". In the end, mom gives up and lets my grandmother act freely. My grandmother's preference for me is simply because of her mentality, in her classical and ancient mind the normal thing is father, mother and children and as I have never had a father, my grandmother has always wanted to make up for that lack with her hugs and kisses, with her grandmotherly love.

 

"Dejame abierto el balcón de tus ojos de gata". ("Leave open for me the balcony of your female cat's eyes").

This phrase is from a song by Joaquin Sabina and accompanied a bouquet of flowers that I gave to mom. His emotion afterwards is an image that I will always remember, until the last second of my life.

 

Sounds very romantic and very sweet.

 

We are either alone in the universe or we are not. Both options are terrifying.

 

Love Anais Nin

 

Anais Nin